Doors by Sally Megans

“Not again Sally. I’m getting bored with this continual obsession with haircuts.”

“Oh! Well, I’m so sorry I bothered you.”

“Now, don’t sulk Sal. I expect I’ll give in soon enough, just leave it out awhile is all.”

“You’ll ‘give in’? You mean you have to fight giving me something I want so bad ?”

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“You know what I mean. I never meant I was resisting giving you anything. Just don’t keep going on about it on so much.”

“I’m sorry it’s such a drag for you. I just enjoy it so… and it makes me so happy. But never mind. I’ll shut up about it if it bothers y’all.”

“Oh God! Now I’ve done it! Come here lover – get a cuddle.”

“No. I wouldn’t want to bore you.”

The door slammed and the bed-springs twanged and whined. A gentle exploration of the handle confirmed that despite the speed of Sally’s departure, time had been found to lock the bedroom door. A soft tap.

“Aw come on gal .. you know I didn’t mean it like that – open this door lover?”

Several more futile attempts were made, but after a full half hour the door remained locked and the significant silence crept under it and pervaded the apartment. Eventually the front door slammed and a car drew away, but still the bedroom door remained locked. In fact it was not re-opened again until the following morning.

“Aw Sal, not again ?”

“Why not. I loved it. I’m not ‘bothering’ you to do it for me, am I?”

“No. In fact I wish you were.”

“What ?! After last month. No thanks.”

“Come on Sally, you are not still sulking about that ?”

“If by ‘sulking’ you mean ‘am I still hurt?’, yes, I’m still sulking about the last time I asked you to make me happy and you told me not to bother you with my obsessions.”

“Sal. Be careful love – let’s not argue again. You know I love you.”

“Yes… yes… sorry. I know you do. Let’s forget it.”

“Forget it! Huh! As if you could, my crop-head !”

“Yes I know! Well, let’s not argue then. Kissy make-up?”

The ritual they had devised to ‘kiss and make up’ after one of their tiffs led, as it so often did, to the bedroom door again being closed until morning.

“Wow Sal! That’s a bit “butch” gal!”

“Hmmm .. isn’t it though! Wanna feel it ?”

“Boy – old baldy! Where did you go? Back to that same barber you found last month?”

“Yes. Like it? I told him I wanted it extra short this time.”

“Well, he took you at your word then. You enjoy it?”

“Well .. yes. But he is so quick and .. indifferent, I suppose.”

“You can’t expect every-one to share your fetish Sal. He is just doing his job, just another haircut to him. Not like when I used to do it for you huh?”

“No lover, not like when you USED to do it for me at all.”

“Oh-oh. Look Sal, I WILL do it for you next time, OK?”

“No thanks. It’s all right.”

“But why not? I cut it short enough for you don’t I?.. and I understand what bits excite you most? Why not?”

“Because we always argue, that’s why – it kills the pleasure. It’s too high a price.”

“Oh! Thank you very much! I suppose as my ‘price’ is so high you’d not want to pay it ever again then?”

“Look, let’s not get back into it again love – I don’t mind going off to a barber shop, you know I love it when I do. Let’s not argue and spoil everything. I truly do not want you to do it for me because it upsets you. Oh… come back lover… no…”

The door slammed and the car’s engine raced as it drew away. Sally locked the door for the night.

“Is that you Sal? Come on through, we are in the back.”

“Hi sweetie – kiss? Hello Mr. Adams.”

“See you let your hair grow out Sally. Long for you.”

“Yes, fancied a change, Mr. Adams. That and because you work my personal barber too much these days… she can’t fit me in !”

“Oh yeah? Never stopped her before, that I recall. She must be hinting Sal! ‘Night all.”

“Are you? Hinting?”

“No. You know I’m not. I love you with or without hair, pixie or baldy. Let me finish up here and I’m nearly ready.”

“Well, there’s many a true word spoken in jest – and you did insist on giving me that perm at Christmas. Does my hair bore you – I mean its style.”

“No. Now come and help me clear the shop up.”

“Shall I sweep up all this hair for you ?”

“Yes please. We has such a rush in here in the last hour I did not get chance to clean it up. See all that long black hair. That was a girl’s.”

“What ! Tell me. Tell me now Mich or I’ll …”

“No, no .. I was kidding love. Some guy with a ponytail had it cut off.”

“Oh. Did you do it for him ?”

“Nope .. I did not even have time to watch so no gory details for you.”

“Gory ? You think my fetish is a war now .. improvement on ‘boring’ I guess!”

“You’d better be smiling when you say that Miss.”

“Shriek! I was! Honest!! Come out here and take a look and tell me I do good work.”

“You sure do – best that floor’s looked in ages. I’ve finished back there. Wanna go .. or..”

“Or what ? Or .. no. No, thank you. I don’t want you to ‘trim’ my hair. I’m letting it grow so I can go get a real brutal barber-shearing.”

“I wouldn’t just ‘trim’ it Miss .. I’d clipper you to the scalp.”

“Ouch ! Yeah, but we’d argue about which bits, how long, the shape – and you’d get pissed at me being too ‘butch’ again. Let’s leave the subject alone Mich.”

“I suppose so – or there will be tears before bedtime ! Let’s go.”

The Hair Dressers’ door shut with a faint tinkling of the old-fashioned door-bell. Michelle locked it securely and they went out around back to the car parked under the old live oak.

“Oh it’s you – back again already.”

“Yes it’s me ‘back again’. What’s up – don’t you want my business?”

“Well … no. My wife told me not to cut your hair again you see. She told me you were weird and might be trouble. So no, I guess I don’t want your business thank you.”

“Hey! Now hang on .. what do you mean ‘weird’?”

“She said you were probably a she-he, a dyke, and would bring others in here.”


“So get out! Go on!”

“No need to shout Mister. What’s the matter? Afraid it’s catching? Ok – Ok I’m going.”

The barber shop door slammed shut behind her sending the combs in the tall glass jars tinkling.

“Short enough for you young ‘Sir’ ?”

“Bitch! Let me see .. move .. Gawd! Mich!! .. it’s so ….”

“Brutal? Butch? But the customer is always right.”

“Wow! Feel the neck! What did you use on top Mich? A number two!?”

“Two? Two is too long for you .. covered all in hair-oh .. but one is one and all ….”

“Come here and kiss me you fool… feel it.”

“Oh? Thought I’d finished did you? I have to shave your neck and around your ears.”

The door to the Hair Dressers rattled and Michelle yelled out they were closed and they froze with bated breath. Then they heard a car door slam and Michelle picked up a straight razor from her boss’s drawer and began to strop it, as he had taught her.


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