My Class Reunion – Tiara
High School was never my cup of tea. Going back to attend my ten-year class reunion seemed out of the question, yet something kept me from shredding that little invitation which arrived in the mail last June. The thoughts of facing my past terrified me, yet intrigued me at the same time, because this time, I knew things would be different.
First of all, I must confess that High school was a very bitter pill to swallow. Not only was I a bit awkward as a teenager, I was a minister’s daughter, perceived as far too much of a goody-goody to be a part of the “in” crowd. My weekends were dull and I spent my nights alone. I was neither ugly nor stupid, yet I was the consummate social reject. No matter how hard I tried, I was the object of scorn, teasing, and on occasion, flat-out bullying.
To add to my problems, I realized that I was not sexually attracted to boys like my other female classmates. While all the other girls in my class lusted over the football players and wrestlers, I lusted over Holly.
I still remember the first time I saw her during my freshman year. From the very first moment I laid eyes upon her, I knew she was special. She had the kind of piercing dark brown eyes that saw right through people. She was not too tall but not too short with curves in the right places – the kind of girl that guys would mentally undress. Her smile made you melt. To top it all of, Holly had the longest, silkiest, thickest honey-colored blonde hair that I had ever seen. When she moved, her gorgeous hair would catch the light in a way that I had never seen before. She made Pantene’s models look like amateurs without even trying.
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Holly was also the kind of girl that could cast a spell on those around her with very little effort. She was an A student, the dance team captain, the student council president, and of course, the homecoming queen. Perhaps it was because she had everything that I secretly longed for that I became intrigued with her. It started with looking a little bit too long while she was changing for gym class, and escalated to the point where I would deliberately go to football games, which I despised, just so I could watch her dance… all from a distance, of course. Every move she made was graceful, and her hair floated all around her like a river of silk. I was mesmerized, and before too long, Holly became my obsession. I let my own short hair grow out since I was so envious of her hair. I longed to touch her and to know what it was like to bury myself in that gorgeous hair.
Being her Biology lab partner was about as close to her as I got, and I remember sitting deliberately close to her just so I could feel her hair accidentally brushing against my arm. I never could forget that feeling even if I tried. It was as close to heaven as you could get here on earth. I longed for her friendship and her approval but Holly was too busy being everyone’s object of adoration to take much notice of me. She was never cruel to me, but I was just another face in the crowd. It was completely irrational of me to like her, much less be obsessed with her, yet she had a strange power over me that I could never understand.
When I graduated, it took all of the strength that I could muster just to walk away from her and pursue my own dreams, yet she never even bothered to say goodbye to me or wish me luck. I meant nothing to her, and it hurt me more deeply than anything I had ever experienced before. Being ignored by the object of my fantasies was far more painful than any bullying I had ever endured. I decided right then and there as I walked down the lonely hallways of my high school for the last time that someday, somehow, Holly would pay! At least for a few fleeting moments, I vowed to make her feel like she made ME feel every day for four long years!
This was not an easy vow to keep. I thought of her often, but Holly went to college in another state and on to law school and didn’t show up at our five-year class reunion since it was such a long drive. Hoping she would attend, I had shown up at our five-year reunion a totally different person than I was in high school, in a slinky little dress. I had worked hard to have a great body and my own Pantene hair, hoping she would be there so I could finally get my chance at revenge. No such luck!
When my ten-year reunion was approaching, I completely transformed myself and hoped with all my heart that this time Holly would be there… and this time, I could keep my vow. I arrived at the reunion early and made some small talk with some old classmates. It was interesting to see how much some of them had changed. Some of the ones who had given me so much trouble in high school actually seemed very apologetic. The evening went on, but still no Holly… and then the door opened and she walked in.
She hadn’t changed a bit. Her hair was maybe a tiny bit darker, but it was still long and devastatingly sexy. I felt my heart beating so fast I could hardly breathe. This woman had haunted me for ten long years, and I was determined to make this a night that she would not forget for a long, long time. I didn’t talk with her for very long, but my eyes were glued to her every move throughout the night.
The music played on, and Holly had never looked so beautiful to me as she did that night. All the drooling guys kept buying her drinks since she was still single, hoping that they would get lucky later on. I kept an eye on her throughout the night as she went from tipsy to flat-out drunk.
Being the sweet little preacher’s daughter that I am, I offered to drive Holly back to her hotel. She didn’t want to wreck her new BMW, so she took me up on my offer. I got her into my car and drove her to her hotel. Then I gave her a little pill, telling her it was some Ibuprofen for her impending hangover. She gladly accepted it. Little did she know, the pill I was giving her would knock her out for three hours or so when taken with alcohol!
Soon she was sleeping like a log. I felt a tinge of guilt as I took a large pair of shears out of my purse. She was just so beautiful that I hated to do what I about to do, yet when I remembered how miserable she and her friends had made me for four long years, I knew I had to go through with this. I took out a brush and tenderly brushed through her gorgeous hair, wishing that she were awake and consenting. It had always been my fantasy to do this very thing. I braided it and unbraided it, watching the way it would fall back into place so effortlessly. I wanted that night to go on and on forever, but the clock kept ticking….
I glanced into a mirror sitting on the dresser. A beautiful, intellegent woman stared back at me. I took the brush and brushed my own hair out. It fell to my waist and was every bit as nice as Holly’s hair. “What am I doing here?” I thought to myself. “I am successful, fit, attractive, and yet I’m still letting my past control me!” I took out my Oster clippers and plugged them into the wall. I brought them to rest on Holly’s forehead wanting to go through with my plan and get my revenge. They buzzed furiously, begging to begin… but I just couldn’t do it.
I turned the clippers off with a loud pop and laid on the bed and cried my eyes out, wiping my tears away with Holly’s beautiful long hair, wishing she loved me.
At the same time, it was time to let her go. I looked at my reflection once again. My long, thick hair was a daily reminder of Holly, and I knew what I must do. I braided my own long hair for the last time, and raised the scissors to the middle of my own neck. I closed my eyes as the scissors made a loud crunch and in 30 seconds, I had freed myself from the pain of a love that never had a chance to blossom.
Then, I caressed Holly’s hair gently one last time, and kissed her goodbye on the cheek. Before I had a chance to change my mind, I ran out of the hotel and back to my car, wondering what I would tell my hair stylist the next day. To this day, I dream about Holly and wonder what might have been, but I guess I will never know.